Daily Journal

I had the craziest dream last night about K C. I had a dream I married her and regretted it the very first night I tried to go out. She told me that she couldn't go out because her throat was sore. I then looked at her closer and noticed all of her imperfections. K C, one of the most beautiful women I know. I looked at her without her makeup laying in my bed with her excuses; all of her flaws exposed. Looking at it now it almost seems like a message to myself that even the most beautiful of women have an ugly side waiting to rear it's head. I read recently that "No matter how beautiful a girl is, somewhere out there, there is a guy who is sick of her." Such a powerful statement, considering the way they make your heart race just by walking by you.

I want my goal today to be to focus on transitioning. What is the best way to transition? There's the ability to cut a story short, and say "Get this," than go into a story. There's the famous Cold Read, which can either turn into a story or get her talking. I think I'm going to work on my cold reading skills today and see where they're at and how much development I need with them. I'm going to make bold statements, such as "You look like the dangerous one." "You look like a good dancer." I feel Transitioning is definately one of the weaker parts of my game when it comes to hitting it home with the HB9's and HB10's . I find when I do have the ability to open I freeze up and am unable to transition into a DHV story or even the simplest cold read.  I think the statement "You look like a good dancer" could easily transition into my story about Edmonton where Kevin ripped up the dance floor while stoned. I could then do alot of talking about how Edmonton isn't the smallest of my spectrum, that I've always wanted to travel than talk about my Vancouver plans this weekend. My goal is to be able to pull 9's and 10's numbers and home consistantly and in order to do that I must start approaching them. During the day, at night, all the time. Before I condition myself to approach 9's and 10's during the day I must first condition myself to approach and talk to anyone during the day. Lean over my shoulder and make a comment, talk to someone on the train. Even if I'm the only person doing all the talking, I'm developing my personal self by having the confidence and the ability to talk to strangers in every environment.

I was having serious issues yesterday, with two things. I really wanted to stop at the Casino on the way home aend when I got home and looked outside at the bong there was a moment where my mind talked to me and said "Do it, get high." It's pretty hard quitting gambling and weed, but I know that in the end it's for the best and that realistically there is nothing to be gained for the exception of momentary satisfaction from both. In the end, the long run, the gym is the best place for me to be. There is no where else where I feel more at home, where I'm more excited to be. Knowing I'm taking baby steps to becoming that person I wanna become is the best feeling in the world, there really isn't anything else I'd rather do than be a football player. It's funny because I always take the time to ask people "If you could be anything in the world with no chance of failure, what would you be?" They tell me their dreams and ambitions, and I listen with an open ear and closed mind. Most of them tell me they're on their way to becoming what they've always dreamt of, but you can't tell me that Johns dream was to be an accountant when he was a teenager. Most people are too afraid to say what they've always dreamt of being because they don't want to re - live the pain of the fact that they really are letting that dream die. Looking back I never took the time to ask myself; "If I could be anything in the world with no chance of failure, what would I be?" I know the answer. I'd be a football player, being paid to do what I love. So what am I going to do? I'm going to take baby steps, every day, to becoming that person I've always wanted to be. Not for anyone else, not to prove anyone wrong. To prove me right, that I deserve to be there, that I'm destined to play ball, that this is what I've always meant to be.

Every day I look at the television and I see people getting paid to do what they love. Perform for us on the field, on the poker tables, ripping it up in Monster Trucks. I don't want to be 40 years old drinking my woes away in the local pub telling people about how good of a football player I was only to justify the reason I'm not playing with my shoulder injury. People bounce back from injury all the time, it happens in sports. Since I first laid hands on a football in grade 10 I've always wanted to be a baller. It's time to take the nessisary steps to becoming that person I want to be.