Its wierd, I don't usually write field reports on my awesome nights. I'm unsure as to why that is, as I figure it'd be cool to look back at both my successes and failures. What made last night so awesome? It was my best friend Cody's 20th birthday and we just went out with the intention of causing shinanegans. Cody shows up at the new condo at 7PM and from 7 - 8 we sat watching episodes of The PickUp Artist laughing at the failures and clapping at the successes. We went out to the liquor store down the street to grab a 26 of Whiskey because "we are getting fuuucked up tonight!" Before the night began we were watching some Keys to the VIP and they stressed the importance of racking up rejections in order to become accustomed and used to the feeling. The episode stressed how rejection should be embraced as a learning curve and as a laugh for you and your friends. Thats exactly what we went out with the intention of doing.
We started out the night inviting two girls out. Cody's fucking one, and he was relying on me to be the wingman to her friend.That I can do. Turns out I went to Junior High with the girl Cody's now fucking and I used to be the biggest.. asshole.. EVER to her. I remember torturing that girl, calling her turban and shit. Bruuutal lol. She texts Cody at around 9 "I don't think we're going to come. My friend's really shy". Cody shows me the text and asks me what I should say to it. Immediately I take his phone and call her off of it. She answers, shocked to hear it was me. We make small talk, she told me she thought I hated her. I told her I was a major asshole in Jr High and I'm really sorry for what I did to her blah blah. They say they're on the train headed downtown to go to the bar (cody and I wanted to go clubbing.. not bar tonight) so I tell them that since my place is on the way downtown, they should come over and drink with us first and then we'll both go our separate ways downtown. She thinks its a good idea so we meet them at the station.
As soon as we meet them I set the tone that I'm playful, and that the outcome of tonight has no bearing on me. I joke about how shes dressed up as an Egyptian princess and she says she's a mermaid. Ehh, she's an 8 at best. Too tall for me. This girl was telling me that she's a full time model, that she models in New York and Paris and all I could do was laugh about how a) big her ego really is and b) the validation she was searching out from me. I ran solid game on this girl the whole night but she was fucking bonkers, like missing a few bolts. At one point I asked her what she wished she could be when she was a kid and she told me she wished she was dead, that her life sucked and she pukes up all her food. Hmm. No wonder this bitch is single, I think to myself. We end up coming to my place, drinking for a bit and decide we want something to eat. There's a lounge right out the backdoor of my condo so we go there for drinks and wings. HBModel ends up eating so much that her stomache starts to hurt. We walk to the train station a block away and right as we were about to get on the train HBModel takes off and hurls everywhere. Awesome. The train was roling up so I told Cody I'd stay with them if he wanted me to just because its his 20th birthday. I hate dumb attention seeking girls. Right then HB7 calls Cody "Hey, shes puking so you guys take that train and we'll meet you at Roadhouse."
YEEEESSS. Thank god. We board the train to downtown dressed like a couple shit disturbers. I was wearing a tight spandex morph suit and told people I was invisible and Cody was wearing one of the police officer uniforms from Reno 911. It was fucking aweeeesome. There's a 4 set standing right next to us on the train so I decide to get out of my head and open them. Formal introductions were made than I told them we were on our way to Roadhouse. They said they were going too and we all agreed it'd be a good idea to party together. This set went well because I included everyone in the conversation, I befriended the obstacles and the target was giving me enough IOI's that I would be able to isolate her from her friends once we got into the club. We get off at the same stop and walk to Roadhouse with 4 girls in our arms, which was a very good idea in retrospect and I'm very glad I decided to open the set on the train. Oh yeah, its fucking Halloween.. we probably should have gotten to Roadhouse before 11pm. The line was insaaaane, it was at least half way back to the set of lights to anyone who's ever been to Roadhouse you know how nuts that is. Cody and I stood in line and befriended the people in front of us, complimenting them on their costumes. They laughed and the girls we walked in with seemed to have more interest in us knowing we could make friends anywhere we went. Siiick. The line was way too long though, we stood in line for 5 minutes before we decided it'd be a good idea to go back to the condo, finish off the 26 we bought and head to the Backalley. Right as we're about to leave, the two crazy bitches call us.
"Hey, shes done puking now we're on our way to Roadhouse."
That's the most attractive thing I've heard all night.
"Actually we're headed back to the Condo for a bit to finish off our 26. Meet us there and we'll go to the Backalley."
The conversation ended and we ended up picking them up at Lounge Burger, the place we had gone for wings. This girl was nuts, she was back in the car and I started convo.. "Hey champ, how you feeling?" "Like fucking ass, but I'll still drag myself along." Stay home if you're gonna ruin the party. We drive past the alley and decide the line is waaaaayyyy too fucking long to even bother waiting in it. The French Maid it is. At this point I wasnt interested in putting up with HBModel's crap so I was determined to go into the French Maid, and game. It started with the front desk girl, making fun of her rabbit ears. I then befriended the doorman to the point where he gave me a few tickets for free shots. Then I went up to the bartender in my invisible costume and made her laugh, she was then very curious about what I looked like so I made her guess and she didn't even come close to the fact that I was black. I made fun of her ghostbusters costume and moved along. Walking by the stripper on the small stage with one pole I saw some of my old Jr High friends sitting front and center pervert row just loooooving this girl, she was totally teasing them. I made eye contact with her, challenged her to a strip off by slowly taking off my invisible jacket and she seemed really into it... then again they kind of get paid to be into it. All of a sudden, HBModel comes from out of no where, grabs my arm and spins me around to walk with her. I turned and walked with her. In retrospect, I should have brushed her off and gone back to my friends right away, telling her I'll be there in a minute because I believe I lowered my percieved value by ditching people I knew for her. This girl was nuts man, let me tell you.
Finally we decide to leave the strippers to drop these two girls off. It's been a long night, Cody's trying to save it by getting his girl to sleep over but she says she has to work in the morning, so no dice. It's 1:00 when we drop them off and we're both thinking that the night isnt over yet, so we decide to go to Ranchmans. Great idea, it was awesome right from the start. I walked in and right away recieved female attention for my Invisible Man outfit. I stuck out from everyone that was there and people loved my costume. I was opened right away by a 5 set and asked if she's ever kissed a guy without lips than kissed her. She was like "Wtf!?" but was totally into it, got her friend to take a picture of us and tried to dance with me. She was a 7 at best so I exited and continued on. I then walked up to a two set at the bar and asked them what they were supposed to be. They told me they were Robin and Wonderwoman and I complimented them on their badass costumes. This set went really well, we bonded over commonalities such as we all hated country bars and we couldn't get into the other cool night clubs because of the line ups. I really had to pee so I headed to the washroom and moved on with my life. On my way I saw HB9 waitress and asked her to unzip my costume so I could pee. Before she did I made her guess what nationality I was and she guessed white, I negged her on her shitty guess and she laughed it off. We vibed really well and had a good talk and I tried to get her to come dance with me but she was working. I had to piss really bad at this point so I went for the number close and it went like so:
"You're really cool, we should continue this talk when you're not working."
"Haha, I'd give you my number but I have a boyfriend."
"I have a cat."
She burst out laughing and I took out my cell phone and handed it to her. She put in her number and I FINALLY went to pee. Fuck, this shit is a complicated proccess. I came out and couldn't zip up my costume so I opened HB8 and asked her to do so. She did it and I introduced myself, locked in and we talked for a few minutes. I decided to bounce to a different part of the club with her so I told her we should go dancing and she agreed. We danced for 10 or so minutes, had a dance off, made fun of other people on the dance floor, admired the fact that there was at LEAST 15 guys dressed up as Top Gun.. ridiculous. I number closed but in the end I really should have taken this girl home, we bounced everywhere together and she just jumped through every hoop and compliance test that I threw at her. Fuuuuck. Oh well. Lesson learned. I number closed and told her I'd take her back toher friends (at this point it was last call, I had spent around half an hour with her) so I took her back to her friends. I went to find my friends standing at the door making fun of everyone that passed by them extremely obnoxiously. I opened a two set of Hb8's who werent dressed up.
"What are you guys supposed to be?"
"We just got off work."
"Are you guys dressed up as losers?"
"What!! No!! You asshole, we cant even see your face."
"For all you know I could have drool coming out of my mouth, one eye looking at you and one looking at the fridge. I use this mask cause secretly I'm reallllly ugly."
Out of no where some random girl came up to us and told us she wanted to take a picture of all of us because she thought we were realllly sexy. This was awesome because she hugged me really tightly and kissed me on the cheek (at this point she hadnt seen my face yet). Finally I made her guess what I was and she said I was half something. Shitty guess, but I took off my mask and she was satisfied that I wasn't as ugly as I had convinced her I really was. I convinced her I had buck teeth and my breath smelled bad, it was awesome. I number closed her after building some comfort and we found commonalities to working in the bar industry.
Overall fantastic night, I think it's because I went out to have fun with my boy with the intention of getting rejected. I really think I need to do this more often because I was saying things that I THOUGHT were going to get me blown out and they actually worked the best. I was calling girls retards the whole night, insulting their outfits, telling them they looked like the losers in the club. It was sweet, and I had a blast doing it. This is my long ass blog for the day, thanks for reading!
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